Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Wifey Wednesday

It's Wifey Wednesday over at To Love, Honor and Vaccum.

I'm going to be real honest here so if you don't like  honesty and you don't want to hear about troubles in someone's life then you should just skip this post and move on to happier things. Don't worry... it's not awful awful bad stuff... just my life and where I am at and I am going to share it because I know that even if no one else will admit it that I am not alone.

The other day on the radio I heard some Christian talking about a book they wrote. I don't remember the author or the name of the book but the person said something along the lines of "You've been married for a few years and then all of a sudden you wake up one day, look at your spouse and think 'who are you?'" Well that's kind of how Mike and I feel right now. There is this distance and disconnect and a feeling of not really knowing each other.

People change. And we HAVE changed over the years. And we've let ourselves fall in to being content with our routine and that is how we got here. Now I don't want you all worrying that we are headed for divorce or going around fighting all the time. It's not like that at all. We still get along. We still loooove each other so much. We WILL work through this. But I have to say that where we are currently at in our marriage really sucks. It's not so fun. It feels like something is missing and I hate it.

I know that we need to be more intentional about our time together and how we spend it. It's tough with two little kids that always want your attention, a house that needs cleaned, meals that need cooked. There are so many things demanding our time. If we aren't purposeful about sitting down together and talking it's easy to get to the end of the day and realize we haven't said much. (It doesn't help that he leaves for work before I am up and doesn't get home till about 6pm.)

I don't know. Have you been in this place? What did you do to get out of it? I need ideas people! Help me out please. Pray for me. I would be nice if it didn't take an entire year to sort this thing out. Vacation?

Anyways... I know this is a crossroads. Something NEEDS to change and we are working on figuring that out because if we don't we will end up being those people that drift so far apart that they feel there is no hope and they walk away from each other saying there is just no other way. (We end up doing exactly what Sheila at To Love Honor and Vacuum was talking about in her little rant that was right on.) We are at a place where we either move forward and put some effort in to it all or we pretend nothing is wrong and move apart.

I choose to move forward.

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