This week both Liza and Jason told me things that made my heart hurt for them. Sometimes life is hard and sometimes people aren't nice. My initial reaction was that I wanted to let mama bear loose and jump in and save the day all HOW DARE YOU NOT BE SUPER NICE TO MY BABIES! But that wouldn't do anything for my kids except teach them to run home to mommy every time someone hurt their feelings and let mommy deal with it.
Plus... they were such minor situations! (Why is it so easy to overreact when someone hurts our kids!?)
Liza shared how some girls in her class weren't including her in conversations. She said they just say, "Oh you wouldn't understand," and then continue to leave her out. When it's lunch and you have assigned seats and this continues to happen... it stinks! I could see it all over Liza's face... this hurts her feelings.
We had a nice conversation about it and talked about forgiving people, choosing good friends, rumors, and gossip. By the end Liza was her spunky little self again and hopefully she had some ideas of how to handle it if it happens again.
Jason's situation happened on the bus. He told me one morning as we were snuggling.
JASON: Some kids on the bus weren't being nice to me.
ME: Oh yeah... how were they being not nice?
JASON: They were saying that I wasn't cool.
ME: Hmm... that hurts your feelings, doesn't it.
JASON: *nods yes*
ME: Well I think you're cool and your mom's opinion is the only one that matters!
JASON: *gives me the "seriously mom" look that he does so well*
ME: Want to know what I would say to them if they told me I wasn't cool?
ME: COOL! I never really wanted to be cool!
JASON: *smiles and laughs a little*
ME: Really though, some people are going to think you are cool and some aren't. Just like some people like me and some don't. Can you believe that Jason? That some people don't like your mom!?
JASON: *very matter-of-fact* Yes.
ME: What!? You are supposed to think everyone should like your mom!
JASON: Not everyone is going to like you mom. That's just life.
At least the little things I have been telling him along the way are sinking in. :)
Thankfully the boys on the bus seemed to forget about picking on Jason the next day.
Hopefully the girls that are supposed to be Liza's good friends start including her in their conversations again.
But mostly... I hope that I've given them the tools to remain confident about who they are and to deal with hurtful situations in a healthy way.